For me, the best appetite suppressant is: when you are emotionally stressed. I was, a few days ago. And believe me I really lost my appetite not just in eating but mostly in everything. Thank God, it’s over. But if being emotionally stressed is the price I have to pay to lose weight, no thanks! I’d rather get physical and sweat and exercise if that’s the case.

On one of my previous post I mentioned I want to buy a car. Even used cars would do. But something came up. And I truly believe that it was a sign that now is not yet the time. I know someday soon. But I am not sad. In fact I am glad because I learned patience. Dying to myself is what I call it. Crucifying myself with its passion and desire maybe too heavy but it really is. God knows how much I wanted to own one already. But there is always a right time for everything. And now is not…

I admire how people can eat too much and yet they don’t get fat. I know of a friend who eats like there is no tomorrow. But when you look at her, she looks so fit. She seems not to worry at all at what she eats. I know she exercises. I bet she does not need to take a phentermine diet pill. I wish I had that discipline and passion to stay and look fit.

Tomorrow we are going to have our first Strategic Planning with our new SOM. We will be going to Cordova. As I checked my email, I saw the itinerary for the 2 days activity. First day: it’s going to be a whole day conference. Where is R&R (rest and recreation)? I asked my self, silently of course. But then I had to think again. If we are running a business, we should be doing this conference because this is important. Small businesses needs business plan consultants, how much more a big company like this. So, I rephrased my thoughts. At least we are going out…Would it be better to just stay at the 12th floor conference room instead? NO way…

I hate so say this and I hate to admit it, but every time I look at myself in the mirror, I am starting to see tiny wrinkles under my eyes. Oh no! Though it is not that obvious yet, but if I really take a closer look at it, it is there. I am starting to search around for the best eye cream that could take this away, or at least prolong this from coming to the open. I hate to admit it, but I am going there. I do not know if I am just too conscious with age but I know that I am still not fifty, but halfway there…I never really appreciated beauty secrets until now. Because when I was young, I was always happy with my face…I do not know if I can still be… Yes, reality really bites…

I have been working in the graveyard shift for four years already. The kind of work that I do would require me to work at midnight. Ever since then, coffee has been my best friend. I drink two to four cups when I am in the office. I know that too much of everything is not good. But if I cannot drink coffee, in just a few minutes I will be sound asleep in my desk. It is not a beautiful sight to see. So I make it a point that I have a Capresso ready with coffee every time I feel I would like to travel to dreamland. My new motto, a coffee a day, keeps the snores away…

I want to buy a car.  I have been thinking about it recently and have been discussing it with my husband.  New car, used car, I don’t care.   So I am now thinking about my options. I am starting to search online and gather some advises from few close friends.   What do need to consider if I am to buy one. How the car looks when I am driving it and the of course the color.  The rest of the details, I am clueless.  Good thing I have checked www.BuyYourCar.co.uk. There I found New or used cars for lease or pay cash for. It did answer most of my questions about car.

Recently, it has been raining in our place.  I really love the rain.  But then again, there are things that you cannot do when it rains.  You cannot jog and definitely, you cannot take your kids to the park or take your dog for a walk.  So there are times when it is raining too much, you would wish for Mister Sun to shine.  You would wish you were living in Arizona.  Enjoying the sun, the walks in the park and enjoy many more beautiful things to do. I love it when it rain, but I definitely like the heat as well.  Living in Arizona is not a bad idea at all.

Bloody Red is what my friend would call our “stats” and measure how we perform as a whole.  My team failed in CSAT…Customer satisfaction Month to Date…We just launched a New Product that is in demand to the public and got positive feedback from consumers.  We were all preparing for the big day…Training left and right, teach backs and all…But when our consumer give but praises to the product, they failed our reps surveys…It is very ironic.  Verbatim from customers such as Rep was not helpful, Rep was not knowledgeable, Rep does not communicate clearly…Where did I ever go wrong?  I asked my self… I was tempted to shout at those under me and blame them for not doing their job.  For not providing a “Service to Remember” as what I always remind them…Then it dawned on me as I thought, there must be a reason for all of this…

Yes, I was too focused on passing the standards…I was thinking too much of being competitive with the other teams who were able to handle the pressure too easily.  I forgot my promise to my team.  I promised them that I will make sure that they will enjoy coming to work and not just delivering what is asked of them but at the same time come to work and enjoy work.  I am accountable of these numbers.  I failed to keep my promise…Maybe, they are partly to be blamed because they are the ones interacting with our customers.  But I should be accountable still.  Because they are My Team.  I should take care of them.  Give them recognition of the good work they have done.  A simple pat on the back and say good job would mean a lot to them… I know.  I have been on their shoes… It’s not an easy job I know, and I failed to recognize their effort…But today, when I get to work, I make a commitment that I talk to my team, one by one and give them a heartfelt thank you for the sacrifice, the Overtime they rendered without complaining and for showing up to work is already more than enough…I am accountable, because I should not only lead, but be one with them…

Dear Daddy,

I thank God for you.  I am so blessed to have you as my father and I would not trade you for a million dollar.  Your abounding love cannot be comprehended.  All the hard works you have done to provide for me, no man can exceed.  All those good traits and Christian values I got from you, no man can take.  I want the whole world to know that I am proud to be your child.  You were always there for me.  When my heart breaks, your comfort is there to ease the pain.  When my mind fails, your encouragement is there to give hope.  When I can seem to do anything right, your helping hand is there to make the loads easy.  For the so many wonderful things you have done for me that made me who I am now, I thank you.

I am aware that life is not always on good weather, because sometimes things would just turn out the way we never dreamed to happen.  I want to say sorry for all the not so good times that came, I contributed to it.  I am sorry for the many times I have taken for granted your discipline.  For those times, I was not appreciative of your presence and ignored all of your efforts to make me happy.  Sometimes, I am carried away by the seductive lures of the world that often led me to temptation.  I have hurt you so much, but I am aware that sometimes you just try not to show it.  I am sorry for being rebellious with your teachings and do things my own way knowing that when I fail, you will always be there to pull me through.  For the abusive acts, that I do to disappoint you and the hurtful ways I have done that breaks your heart.  I am sorry.

I want you to know that oftentimes I may not seem thankful, but deep inside I am.  I just hide it because I am shy to admit that most of the time   you are right and you know what is best for me.  I am regretful for hurting you many times, because I do it out of selfishness.  Though I may not say it everyday, though I may not show it all the way, no one can stop me now and nothing can prevent me to Thank You.  Though oftentimes I would fail and hurt you, don’t ever convince yourself that I don’t love you but it’s just because I am still young and I still have a lot of things to learn.  Hoping you will continue to support me as I learn a new lesson each day, explaining to me the how’s and why’s of life and continue to share with me not only my joys but above all the low moments, which during these times, I‘d greatly need you.  I pray that God would give you and me a long life shred with laughter, tears and prayers.

Love,

Your child

note:  this really is not a letter I sent to my dad..This is a piece that a wrote for “Best Father’s Day Letter” writing contest.. Just want to post it since it did not win the contest…