I wanted to reward myself. I have been working hard these past days even to point of wanting to quit already. I felt I have worked so hard I got burned out. I wanted to treat myself to a spa. What a simple wish for a year-round toil. I dream to have a spa just for myself. I’d get a spa cover and open it up only when I get stressed. Stressed from work and even stressed from dreaming. Whew!

If I am to get my life ensured now, and I take the Insurance exam, I am surely to fail. Not that I am suicidal or something. I simply mean, would stress make you fail in that life insurance test they will conduct before they grant you your insurance? I don’t know. But it being stressed is part of it, I am so busted. I heard there are some Life Insurance company that has No Medical Exam Life Insurance required. Then let’s go for it. Have ourselves insured. I used to be confident before that let the future take care of itself. But honestly, I am not sure anymore. I hope I’d get that confidence back. I want to be accountable for everything that is going on with me right now. I don’t want to point fingers to people behind me, in front of me or the person beside me. In the test of life, you should be accountable with every decision you make whether they give out a positive or negative result. It was you who took the test in the first place. And you should blame anybody for it. So now, I am taking accountability of what’s going on with me right now.

Last week, we had an appreciation day for Team Managers. I got a gift check for diamond peel. I was thinking, “what am I going to do with this?” I don’t have anything to peel on my face…I don’t have any adult acne or something. Then I thought of giving it to my mother. I did not regret I did, coz I saw how happy she was when she got the gift check…Glad I did it…

My husband is going to Singapore tomorrow. I would not be able to see him for 6 days. I know I will be left with the kids at home and as early as now, I am trying to figure out on how to get rid of my boredom since I will be sleeping in our room alone. Getting a Slingbox maybe and watch TV the whole time. I am on leave from work and I promise myself that I leave all office work at work. I hope I won’t get tempted.

Communication is very important. That is why for me cell phone plans is more practical than pre-paid plans. We call and text to people if we wanted to tell them something. We call them if we wanted to relay a very important message to a person. It pisses me off especially when I wanted to talk to the person and I can’t because of cell phone limitations. I compare cell phone plans and chose the best plan that suites my needs. I am not that fond with text messaging but I’d rather talk. I am a talker. I wanted to talk and I am most honest when I talk rather than when I write. When you text, you’d be able to get your mobile phone history. But when you talk, it roots directly to the heart. It can either make or break a person’s heart. I wanted to spill the beans every time. I would choose to tell the person about how I feel rather than keeping it to myself. I would want to tell you that I like you and know that you don’t care rather than not tell you at all and live my entire life with “what if’s”. I will tell you no matter what.

I attended a baptism ceremony last Sunday. As I was watching my friend carry her baby I saw the happiness and the glow on her face. I felt happy for her. Gone are the days when prenatal vitamins was all she took. Ok, that’s exaggerated. Well, that’s what I see her take every time when she was still carrying the baby inside her. And now those days payed off. I see a beautiful angel on her arms. And it’s quite a pleasurable sight to watch.

I know I lost a few pounds because I can now zip my pants with ease. But I still need to lose more. I am neither exercise nor taking diet pills. I just controlled my diet. No special diet and all. Just cut off the carbo. I am not in a hurry though. But at least I know that every sacrifice counts. It’s a good reward.

Am I just misinterpreting things? There are situations that catch my attention and get me confused. There has been a lot that is going on lately. Some won’t do any good and some just feels good but still not good at all. I have been saving the drama for myself. I don’t want to get others involved. How I wish that I can just put all in a slideshow and just watch it over and over until I don’t want to watch it anymore. How I wish this is just going to be easy. I never expected all these sacrifices to pay off, but just hoping that I won’t end up losing and quitting.

I created a new website because as I was browsing one time online, I saw a promo about getting a free domain subscription free for a year. So I signed up right away. And since I have this beautiful journey.net still active, I used the new domain to a website I created for free. I changed the domain name and now the new website is called, momwomandandafriend.com. In that site I blog about motherhood. I talk about anything a mother can go through. I talk about from raising kids to HomeFiurniture. I also talk about things that every woman can go through. I talk about friendship, being a friend and I talk about friendship. The website has been there for quite some time already, but it was last June 10 that the website was officially launched. I hope that one day, that website will also become a source of inspiration to many and will one day have its own identity. There are just too many things that I wanted to share and post. I just hope for one thing though. I hope that I will be able to balance time and not get burned out. Juggling from being a mother, a daughter, a wife, a friend, a blogger and a career woman can be very challenging.

Losing a pound per day seems impossible. I am running out of time. I committed to eat half of my normal intake daily. If the due date arrives and I still have these excess fats, then let it be. Confidence starts from how I look, yes its true. But at the end of the day, it’s still about the talent that I have and giving my all when I’m already on that stage. My hcg diet would still be of help though. Now that I still have time.